It Is Perfectly Legal to Have This Much Fun

Writer/semi-neurotic/retired hipster who loves memoirs, really dark humor, girls with guitars, and beer.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Big Booty


I babysit for my friend Melissa's kids tonight. Eva is 4, Elena is a little over a year old.

While I was getting them ready for their bath, Eva told me "Your booty is in my way."

"I'm sorry," I responded. "Do I have a big booty?"

"Yeah," Eva responded. "You do."

She then proceeded to use her hands to show me approximations of the booty size of every girl and woman she knows.

"Elena's booty is this big," she said, holding her hands a few inches apart. "My booty is this big." Hands a little further apart. "My mom's booty is a little bigger, like this," she continued, inching her hands out, "and Oh-ma's (grandma's) booty is this big." With that she pulled her hands apart the length of a ruler.

"And what about my booty?" I questioned.

"Yours is this big," she said, adding a generous inch or two to Oh-ma's booty.

"I have the biggest booty?" I asked.

"Yes," said Eva, "you do."