Live Crucifixion...TODAY!

Right now, as I type this...at this church down the street from our neighborhood over here on the East Side there is a man with long hair and a beard covered in "blood" and hanging from a huge wooden cross...it is part of their "live crucifixion."

Seriously, there is a big blue and white banner next to the cross that reads "Live Crucifixion from 7 am to 7 pm TODAY" or whatever...and there's this dude, alive but "crucified" hanging from this cross with streaks of red fake blood covering his nearly naked body. I am not shitting you...Oh yeah, and he's got the crown of thorns thing happening too.

People who I can only assume are fellow church members are on the ground at the foot of the cross looking up and talking to him...when I drove by and saw this sight I literally screamed out loud because it scared me so bad. I hope no kids see it because it is truly disturbing.

I have to say some of the realism is ruined by the fact that the dude playing Jesus is talking back to his fellow church members down on the ground...

(Imagining conversation...)

"Hey Bill, how you feelin' up there?"

"Well, my arms are kinda achy...but, you know, that's nothing compared to what the Lord and Savior went through during the real thing."

"Well....we're heading down the street to the Burger King. Can we get you anything for when you come down?"

"Yeah...a hamburger would be nice."

"Want fries with that?"

"Yeah, some fries would be nice...Heck, I'm playing the Lord and Savior today. I think I deserve some French Fries, don't you?"

(Laughs) "Yeah man, I think you do."